Can I cry now? Please. I just got cursed out and insulted by a student in front of the class and it stings. Really and truly. I shouldn't take it personally. A rule teachers must follow in order to keep their heads above water. But it takes effort. And right now, with all the other depressing losses in my life, my insides are bulging outward. I wish to sulk in the misery of the untimely death of my loving Renee (whom I just wrote about). Life seems so temporary and security no longer exists. Change is inevitable. Childhood slips away. Still there is light. I hope. I realize that my student is a tempramental adolescent and the sting will ease. In the words of Renee, "Lisa, you got to develop thicker skin." I'll keep working on it.
To Renee's family in mourning: "May the Lord comfort you with all the mourners of Zion and Jerusalem."
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
Saturday, May 8, 2010
I Feared you, I Love you
I dedicate this post to Renee Darvin who challenged my choices and offered a new direction; the right one. I love you Renee. Forever.
I received my Master's degree in May 2008 after two rigorous years at Teachers College from the Art and Art Education program. It was the best of times and the worst of times. Shortly after I began my journey to become a great art educator, my father passed away. Suddenly. I began my degree as a child but completed it as an old person. Tragedy broke me. During that dark and ugly time I felt safe inside the walls of Macy Hall. My friends, which I met just a few months before, provided comfort and support. It surprised me how smiley, giggly, happy, and focused I could be at school. Unlike the grief that swallowed me at home.
Choosing TC was the best and first decision I had ever made. I finally found my strengths.
But Renee, because of you I found a voice. My voice. You saw me. A larger person behind my softer shell. Oh Renee you've touched my soul. I wish I was the one single person whose life you profoundly affected with your stern generosity, but no, you reached so many.
Yesterday I went to Teachers College for my second reunion with the Art Ed graduates. Of course I went enthusiastically, expecting to see and chat with many people I have not been in contact with for too long :( But my experience was unlike what I had anticipated. About a month ago a letter arrived from Renee inviting alumni to the reunion while also announcing her retirement. Well deserved. (she's been educating for 50 years!) This year the reunion was to honor her achievements as a phenomenal art educator and essential component of the Art Ed faculty at TC. But I was not aware of her health condition. I heard she had not been well, but until she arrived yesterday evening I had not accepted this truth. No one likes to see a hero become weak. Unnatural. Still the event was beautiful, heartwarming, and enlightening about Renee's special and honest character.
So if you've met Renee you know she's tough as nails and will always continue to teach whomever she can.
Thank you Renee. Thank you for your gifts. You are my hero. I love you.
I received my Master's degree in May 2008 after two rigorous years at Teachers College from the Art and Art Education program. It was the best of times and the worst of times. Shortly after I began my journey to become a great art educator, my father passed away. Suddenly. I began my degree as a child but completed it as an old person. Tragedy broke me. During that dark and ugly time I felt safe inside the walls of Macy Hall. My friends, which I met just a few months before, provided comfort and support. It surprised me how smiley, giggly, happy, and focused I could be at school. Unlike the grief that swallowed me at home.
Choosing TC was the best and first decision I had ever made. I finally found my strengths.
But Renee, because of you I found a voice. My voice. You saw me. A larger person behind my softer shell. Oh Renee you've touched my soul. I wish I was the one single person whose life you profoundly affected with your stern generosity, but no, you reached so many.
Yesterday I went to Teachers College for my second reunion with the Art Ed graduates. Of course I went enthusiastically, expecting to see and chat with many people I have not been in contact with for too long :( But my experience was unlike what I had anticipated. About a month ago a letter arrived from Renee inviting alumni to the reunion while also announcing her retirement. Well deserved. (she's been educating for 50 years!) This year the reunion was to honor her achievements as a phenomenal art educator and essential component of the Art Ed faculty at TC. But I was not aware of her health condition. I heard she had not been well, but until she arrived yesterday evening I had not accepted this truth. No one likes to see a hero become weak. Unnatural. Still the event was beautiful, heartwarming, and enlightening about Renee's special and honest character.
So if you've met Renee you know she's tough as nails and will always continue to teach whomever she can.
Thank you Renee. Thank you for your gifts. You are my hero. I love you.
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